Not just because he’s too busy at work, but because he has hooves instead of fingers. ![]() He actually, physically cannot call you.ġ0. Realize that this world is cruel, and the only time you’ll ever experience agape love is when jacking off beasts of burden. ![]() So you find yourself on a talk show circuit, exhorting the spiritual benefits of horse masturbation. Each time you appear on TV, you’re actually secretly hoping Trixy is watching, but then you’re again reminded he’s probably color-blind, there’s no cable in the barn, and he’s the kind of horse that can only ever receive handjobs, not return them (again, because of the whole hoof thing).ĭunstan McGill grew up in isolated wealth on a family-owned island off Maine, where he was kept constant solace by his confidant and riding horse, Aloysius.
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